Being an accountant isn’t all about spreadsheets, calculators, and serious discussions about cash flow (though, let’s be honest, we do love a well-balanced ledger). Over the years, we’ve heard some hilarious, cheeky, and totally harmless confessions from accountants, bookkeepers, and finance professionals – some from our own team, some from old colleagues, and even a few gems we’ve stumbled across on Reddit!
So, if you thought finance was all numbers and no fun, think again. Here are some of the best (and totally legal!) accountant confessions we’ve come across…
1. The Spreadsheet Sabotage
We all know that one colleague who treats their spreadsheets like ancient scrolls, protected by layers of unnecessary passwords and formatting that makes no sense. One accountant confessed to ever-so-slightly tweaking a difficult colleague’s formulas so their perfectly ‘untouchable’ spreadsheet needed a little ‘extra work’ to fix. Nothing major – just enough to keep them guessing!
2. The ‘Special’ Coffee Reserve
Every office has a secret hierarchy of coffee quality, and accountants are no different. A few finance professionals admitted to keeping the premium coffee for the team – while clients who are difficult, late payers, or just plain rude? They get the instant coffee from the back of the cupboard. (No judgment… you know they deserved it!)
3. The Mysterious Printer Malfunctions
When that one person who never listens to advice keeps printing every single email they receive, some accountants admit to taking action. Whether it’s subtly unplugging the printer, setting it to a different tray, or simply ‘forgetting’ to refill the paper, sometimes technology just has a mind of its own… right?
4. The ‘Lost’ Receipts Trick
One confession from a finance veteran? If a client insists they gave you a stack of crumpled receipts that never appeared, sometimes it’s easier just to nod, smile, and pretend you’ll ‘check again’ rather than argue. (Of course, they never actually handed them in—but let them have their moment.)
5. The Silent Judgement of Spreadsheets
Accountants may be known for keeping a straight face, but deep down, we are silently judging your spreadsheet skills. If you’ve ever seen someone manually sum a column instead of using a formula, just know that your accountant may be having an internal crisis. (It’s fine, we’ll fix it. But just… learn SUM, please?)
6. The Strategic Out-of-Office Reply
It’s 4pm on a Friday, and an email from that client lands in the inbox. You know the one – the one that requires paragraphs of explanations, extra work, and possibly a calculator. Solution? The trusty out-of-office reply! Just a simple ‘I’m currently out of the office and will respond on Monday’ buys the weekend you deserve. Because some problems? They’re Monday problems.
7. The ‘Accidental’ Late Reply
Ever received an email full of urgent, complicated questions… that mysteriously doesn’t get a response until the next day? Sometimes, waiting a few extra hours magically results in the sender either solving the problem themselves or forgetting it was urgent in the first place. Funny how that works, isn’t it?
Confess Your Own Accounting Mischief!
Whether you work in finance or just love a bit of office banter, we’d love to hear your own funny (and harmless) workplace confessions. Got a great story? Share it with us!
Need an accountant with a sense of humour? Get in touch with us today – we promise we’ll only give you the good coffee (as long as you’re nice!).